Fifteen Steps That Define Retirement.

By Karen and Erica

One day you are an esteemed colleague.

The next day, you are a nobody.

It is rather shocking. And dislocating. 

What happened?  You retired. And the earth shifted.

Here’s a guide to the sequence of post-career events many of us can expect.  

1. Before the big day. It all starts when you realize that everyone else has to retire, so maybe you have to as well. At this point, some of us thrill at the prospect. Those lucky ones have a master plan–or embrace having no plans at all. But most of us are horrified. That was us.
2. On the big day. Inevitably, the day comes. You have to get through it. And you do, perhaps in a daze. People congratulate you, and toast you, and then it is done. 
3. Rest. You realize you are exhausted. Most days you sleep late, have a leisurely breakfast, have a nap. Eventually, you feel like your energetic self again.
4. Fun. Once you revive, you start to have fun. You stay up late, not working. You go out to lunch. You make dinner and theater dates, and keep them. You sit around on Sunday and read the paper. You go shopping whenever you want. The world is yours, and you have all the time you want to explore it.
5. Sadness. To your surprise, perhaps, you miss work. Your career provided structure, purpose, colleagues, and of course a paycheck. While you worked, you wished you had a little more free time. Now you have a bit too much. 
6. You get dissed. You go to a party, and someone asks what you do. You have to say: I was a successful lawyer and now I am not. That does not feel right. You start to wonder–who are you now, if you no longer have a career? You are not sure.
7. Family anxiety. Your family knows you as the hard-driving leader you were. Now, they too wonder who you are. They worry you will seize upon them for companionship every waking moment of the day. Your friends are worried too. You make them nervous and they make you nervous.
8. First strategic thoughts.You begin to understand you need to actually work at retirement. You need to map out a future.
9. The beginnings of an idea. What do you want to do next? Not your old job. A new job? Something different, not quite so time consuming, maybe something in the non-profit world? You have so much experience to offer. You start looking around. And you discover that no-one wants to give you a job. In fact, no-one seems able to discern what you have to offer. And they sure can’t figure out how to slot you into their organization.
10. Shock. Now, you get depressed. Did you become useless overnight? Are you never again going to be able to say, when asked, I am a successful [something exciting]?
11. Danger Zone. Panic sets in. You sre tempted to agree to do almost anything. Your family wants chores done, and you feel you have to say yes. Your excellent non-profit wants you to do something that bores you to tears, and you feel you have to say yes. You are offered a job that could be done by someone with a tenth of your experience, and you feel you have to say yes. Do not say yes!  Say no! Do nothing until you find something fulfilling. Which takes time.
12. Envisioning a new future. You start to realize you have to come up with a game plan for a whole new world. What did you like best about your job, and where can you find a replacement? What did you hate and now want to avoid? How to do that? Start a small business? Write a play? Teach?
13. Talk to everyone. Whatever you envision, talk to everyone. Tell them what your idea is, and ask for their reactions. Anyone who sees you are formulating a future will have something to offer, including contacts. 
14. Start to move. Take one concrete step at a time. Get business cards. Get an office. Find a partner. Take courses if you need to. Try to envision what your future might really look like. Start to move toward it. Worried you might fail? So what? You know by now that you can survive failure. And you also know you have something only a person who has retired can possibly have—experience and wisdom. That’s your springboard to the future.
15. Success. Your plan will take on a life of its own, and you will start to see that your retirement is the beginning of something brilliant. You will stand tall when you tell people what you are doing now. And you will have more fun than you can imagine.

Congratulations!