Not Invisible. Not Done.
By Erica and Karen
When we retired, we felt instantly dismissed–as if we had become irrelevant and old overnight. Luckily, we knew each other, so we were not alone. But we weren’t sure how many other people felt as sidelined as we did.
We began talking to other women, and we heard the same words from almost everyone. Invisible. Shelved. Marginalized.
And when we started Lustre, we heard the same words from all of you.
We began to understand that we are all dealing with a systemic issue–the inability to see clearly the continuing worth of retired and older women. Women who refuse to be invisible. Women who are not done. Women who have long runways and who want to share what they have learned over the decades.
There are millions of us. But each of us deals with this sudden rejection alone, knocked off base by an unexpected reaction. Not sure what to say or how to reassert ourselves. Not even sure how to start a conversation, let alone create a new identity.
So we decided to design a line of tops and totes that would send the message and start the conversation on the right foot. We are not done. We are not invisible. Ignore us at your peril–and your loss.
If enough of us send the message, we will surely change the outdated picture of retired and older women. If enough of us refuse to be sidelined, the world will take account of our value.
We took matters into our own hands when we entered the workforce. We’ll do it again now. Let’s make sure everyone hears us.
I found your website at the most perfect time in my life. After 30 years in corporate consulting – leading teams, traveling to clients nationally and internationally, I started to feel a bit marginalized and invisible as I began to focus on retirement and move to a ‘step-down’ job. Reading your posts have helped me to realize that other women feel that same — I am not alone. Thank you for sharing and your inspiration! Shawn@intorcio.org
There it is!!!!!!
There it is!!!!!!
Why don’t men butt heads with retirement? Do they feel consigned to the marked-down table of goods? (No, they’re likely flexing their boss muscles at the condo association board; please see certain Seinfeld episodes, or otherwise enjoying another round of golf & shmoozing.)
While I agree with Lustre’s argument that retired women aren’t done, permit me to say this: if, as a woman you had influence and power pre-retirement, that doesn’t evaporate. You can still plan charity galas, helm a non-profit board, etc. What’s missing in retirement from the workplace is the kick of a front-page byline, a legal victory for a client, closing a huge sales contract or however you previously defined professional success.
I blame social media for making older women feel invisible; the cult of ‘me worship’ to which social media owes its existence has amplified ‘invisibility’ and making retired women feel miserable about themselves. Whose approval do you need to prove you are a human being worthy of attention?
Thanks, Dorothy! Incisive as always.
Thanks, Dorothy! Incisive as always.