By Karen and Erica

We both like to cook, and we sometimes cook Thanksgiving dinner for our families and friends. It is a challenging meal, because you have to figure out a menu, then get the food, then spend the day cooking while everyone else plays (not that we would prefer to watch football all day.) The meal usually takes ten minutes, then cleanup begins. Thank heavens for wine.

Many people have horrible Thanksgiving turkey stories, too. Erica doesn't, because she is a better cook, but Karen has two, both while in college. The first was when she and her roommate Kate made dinner at Kate’s house. Neither of them knew that the thermostat in the family oven was dead, so the oven just kept getting hotter and hotter. After a couple of hours, the turkey smelled a little too cooked, so Karen went to investigate. The turkey was actually on fire. Taking her life and the turkey in her hands, she put it on the kitchen floor and doused it with water until the flames died down. Then she and her roommate decided to pretend they had planned all along to serve blackened turkey. They were not believed. The turkey was terrible.

The next year, Karen cooked a turkey in one of those bags and in her school housing kitchen. Those decisions were unwise. The oven was wonky, and she had no idea a frozen turkey would not defrost while it cooked in the bag. (If you set the turkey alight it is more likely to defrost fast.) So this time the turkey looked good outside and was icy inside. Also terrible.

Given all that, and the challenges of Thanksgiving meals generally, it is surprising that any of us does cook the meal. Or that Karen is allowed to. But it is fun, and traditional. Someone has to do it.

Here are some of our ideas (not from those college days). Maybe a little late for today, but if you procrastinate, you’ll thank us.

First, think about a smoked turkey. Different and delicious.

Second, make a spicy stuffing. Turkey at its best is not that exciting. Make stuffing with cornbread, throw some corn and some jalapeños in, and maybe a few chestnuts or mushrooms.

Third, consider mashed yams with cream and bourbon and brown sugar. The kids will hate the flavor, so don’t worry about getting them inebriated. Make them regular mashed potatoes. You will like the yams.

Fourth, how about Brussels sprout slaw? We like that better than cooked Brussels sprouts. But if that is a no go, put a lot of butter on the string beans, which you must serve because otherwise it is not Thanksgiving. Almonds on the beans if your guests are into nuts. Or Worcestershire sauce.

Of course you need something cranberry. Put equal amounts of cranberries and kumquats in a food processor with a little sugar, and if you are so inclined some OJ and a drop or two of Triple Sec. Process until crunchy, but not liquid. Refrigerate for a few hours.

Dinner rolls. Lots of them and lots more butter.

Then dessert. Many many pies. Maybe one per person. With ice cream. Pumpkin is mandatory, and we also like pecan and apple and berry and pretty much anything else.

We like Prosecco before, and Zinfandel with, dinner. Cranberry juice with seltzer for the kids.

Have fun! Happy Thanksgiving.