Does Retirement Loom? Be Calm.
By Karen and Erica
Are you retiring at the end of the year? Are you excited? Are you petrified? Are you just ignoring the whole thing?
Whatever your reaction, the process will be the same. Now that we have some perspective, what do we say to new retirees?
The first year can be hard. Everything has changed. There is no way, as far as we can tell, to skip the stages of retirement—especially a little mourning—unless you figure out a way to go back to your old job, which we do not advocate.
Here’s what we experienced:
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The terrified stage—starting before and ending months after the actual date. Is this really happening? No work for the first time in decades? What to do?
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The sleep late stage. So tired. Lovely to sleep in.
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The let’s-play-all-day stage. Fun, but wait. How can all these people be out and about in the middle of the day, going to matinees and late martini lunches? How do they do that and pay for their lives?
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The mourning stage. You loved your job. You miss the work and the community. Maybe not the stress. But there is sadness.
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The disbelieving stage. Why do people act as if you changed overnight from hard-charging career woman to passive old lady?
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The cranky stage. You are not what they seem to think you are. You are still who you were the day before you retired. You’ll show them!
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The transformation stage. Finally, you see something new and exciting on the horizon. Yipeee!!!
Try to find a friend who is in the throes of retirement too. Someone to talk to. And know that you are not alone. Every day 10,000 people in the US reach retirement age—and about half of them are women. They are part of your new community.
Most of all, just understand it is a very big transition, with a lot of dislocation, but never forget that your career has given you all the tools you need to create a fascinating next phase.
The next years really can be golden. In any way you like. You will get through the transition, and then you will take wing.
Love this post. You captured some really great insights and realities of those retiring!
Thanks!
Oh thank you!! Retirement for me is Dec 24 2023. I will turn 70 and have decided it will be my gift to myself after a lifetime of work. I have run the gamut from excited, delighted, resigned, to terrified sometimes from one moment to the next. I simply want to use my remaining says in other ways, so off we go!
I retire 2/3/23 at age 66 and 6 months! It’s all neatly divisible but I’m a bit terrified to move from my fast paced museum career to the unknown. A manic swing from fear to joy and excitement happening daily! Would love to find someone newly retired share support as the journey begins! Any suggestions?
How about if "retirement" occurs when you don’t want it to…you get downsized (older workers are the most expensive!). This is where I’ve been struggling. Since Feb. 2019 after 8 good years at a company, when I received a call from HR and my boss that my job (along with 40 others in the vertical) had been "eliminated" due to "reorg", suddenly, I was without a job. I had thought I would work two more years and was set on that. This is a shock and one that is hard to figure out. I wonder what others who have experienced this one have to suggest. Although I’m involved to some extent in non-profit boards and teaching a bit (4X a year), it’s not enough…not what?
I have just retired from a very stressful sales position and have experienced some of these stages already. I tried to
go back to work almost immediately after resigning from this job to a less stressful job and could t handle the 12 hour physical demands of the job. So, now, I am taking a break to figure out my next steps. Retiring with full social security benefits in August. I won’t stop working entirely. I need the social interaction, structure, and worthiness that a job gives me, but it will definitely be something more ‘fun’.
I am struggling right now with how tired I am. I am not a baller, but find myself taking an hour or two nap every day that I haven’t worked. Is this normal? Should I be worried that something is wrong with me?