Thinking About Family.

By Erica

It turns out that one of the best things I have ever done is take my family to Italy. Transporting us from our normal routines and regular gathering places gave us space to reconnect, share, strengthen the glue that holds us together. We all knew when we left that it was worth the not insignificant time, effort and expense to get there. It was a week together we would never forget. There is no better gift.

There are so many things, planned and unplanned, that made the week magical.

The company, of course, was planned. The talk and laughter was endless—from breakfast, through day tripping, cocktail hour, dinner, and beyond. Doesn’t take too many hostess skills when you bring together a group of people across generations who are smart and funny, warm and caring, interesting and just lovely to be around. And, no drama! Unplanned, though, was one of my favorite moments. Two nieces who live overseas, and who some of us hadn’t seen in close to a decade, arrived close to midnight. The gates opened, the car drove in, and more than one of us broke into very happy tears. Said it all right then.

Then there was the villa. Exceeded expectations. The renovation of our villa by our hosts was immaculately and thoughtfully executed, retaining old fashioned warmth and adding modern amenities. Even with uncooperating weather that made the lovely outdoor spaces largely unavailable, there were beautiful rooms where we congregated in groups large and small. Our hostess Cristina and her staff are extraordinary. Finally, the food. Oh my. Our four course meals on long tables were epic. Who knew eggplant could be so delicious, that we would get addicted to a local pasta called pici, or that over 70 bottles of local wines would be so satisfying (we shipped some home). Perhaps I should post our menus. To die for.

My birthday dinner will stay with me long past the next one. We are a toasting family and the words, written and spoken, always matter. All of us were teary in a good way. To all of the celebrants, thank you. Dinner also gave me an opportunity to say what I wanted to say.

And that was that close families like ours don’t just happen. It takes work to keep a family together when there are so many pressures, from within and without, that can rupture it. That we learned how to do that work from the very best—our parents, aunts and uncles, grandparents—who made often difficult choices and spent the time to create the glue that holds us together.

For this birthday, I wanted to celebrate that work and the glue that holds us together. And I wanted to make sure that the next generation knows that no matter how much effort it takes, it’s worth it. Because it is not only our greatest legacy but also our greatest treasure.